I spent the last weekend on my own with the girls, not a prospect I had relished. But, with a little forethought and by stepping outside my comfort zone it turned out pretty well, boosting my confidence in being out and about, alone with two small children.
On Friday as I contemplated the weekend ahead I was feeling a bit dejected - very tired after a week of rougher than usual nights and significantly on the back foot as little M had been off nursery ill and the start of our rennovations meant our flat seemed even more chaotic than usual. I remembered post on a friend's blog about solo-parenting weekends and the challenge I'd set myself - to enjoy myself and my family life a bit more and so decided to put myself decidedly back on the front foot.
I started with a bit of a blitz on Friday night - putting the house back together so I didn't start off the next day tripping over things and constantly saying "no"..."that's not for playing with"..."put that back please". I set out some activities for little M in an attempt to divert her from her beloved television. She'd watched quite a lot the preceeding week because she was ill and I found the thought of a weekend filled with television too pretty depressing. Most importantly, I think, I made ready for a speedy exit in the morning - packed the pushchair with everything we needed including drink and snacks for myself (I sometimes find I have everything for every eventuality for the girls but not so much as a drink of water for myself). It's so easy for leaving the house to turn into a proper kerfuffle if you have to go hunting round for things. And I made sure I stopped in time to have a relaxing bath - only my third this year and one of those was on midwife's orders to speed up little L's arrival (probably says a lot about how much I need to get a better at relaxing and enjoying myself).
I'm surprised to be writing that we actually had a good day on Saturday, packed with funs things and mini-adventures! Part planning, part sunshine.
We made drop-scones for breakfast (little M cracks a mean egg!) and then dived into the activities. We took the more meandering route to the play area in the local park - I could feel myself relaxing in the lovely weather and actually enjoying the moment rather than stressing about when little L would wake up, whether little M would run off at an inconvenient moment etc. We wandered past the stallholders from the Festival of Yoruba Arts setting up whilst great tunes wafted past. After good dose of playground action we headed back home and made smiley egg faces for lunch (the one pictured is little M's Ben Elf) - a bit improvised but it successfully averted lunchtime stresses.
After an aborted attempt at sunglasses shopping for little M and I we headed back to the park - the festival was livening up. Little M was getting her groove on and said the music made her wiggle - very refreshing given she more often than not turns the stereo off at home if you attempt the listen to anything other than her Rastamouse CD. We had a lovely time. And then - shock horror - didn't scurry home. We carried on to visit my mini-plot. It was the first time I've braved going to tend my mini-plot with two children in tow. Actually it was lovely - I'm not sure what I had been worried about. Little M helped me water the veggies (the few that are left!) and then rambled around picking blackberries and gathering pebbles in flower pots whilst I fed little L.
Saturday was definitely the longest I've stayed out the house with two children and it felt like a significant milestone in increasing my confidence at being out and about. I still get nervous that little L will need feeding out and about and that little M will decide to leggit whilst I'm sitting on some random bench with my boob out. But I'm starting to resign myself to the fact that this happens and get better at managing it.
Sunday wasn't quite so much fun - a bit quieter after our busy Saturday and with a bit more grumpiness but on balance a pretty good (if tiring) weekend. I'll be spending lots of time out and about with the girls over the next month as I escape the rennovations happening to our flat so the weekend's little confidence boost was very timely.
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